There is no god and I am proof.

Wednesday, 17 March 2010

I only beat you

Because I love you? Well if that was the case I'd beat you harder.

Because I love you so much. Anyway, Fenghar is on my ass because he's bored and wants readings or some shit. FUCK YOU I'LL WRITE SCRIPTS IF I WANT TO IT JUST HAPPENS THAT I DO

Spiderman: Hello, citizen. How may I be of service?

Citizen: Hi, I guess. Why are you asking if you can be of service.

Spiderman: The bus is taking a while to get here. (He is booming all of this like a shouty man. Like in that advert. Cillet bang. He is shouting like him.)

Citizen: Yes.

Spiderman: So I wondered if I could be of service.

Citizen: I don't mean to sound rude, but who do you think you are? Not like in an accusatory way, but I actually want to know.

Spiderman: I'm Spiderman!

Citizen: But, you're just wearing a suit.

Spiderman: Oh Shit! I'm not in my costume? Oh shit shit shit.

Citizen: Yeaahhhhhhhh...

Spiderman: [Swings away on his web]

Citizen: Phew, he didn't realise I'm Superman.

Superman: That's because you're not. [Incinerates Citizen with a laser blast from his crotch, because crotches are hilarious]

THAT HAD POPULAR CULTURE IN you love that you whore you love it so much

can you hear that? Someone is coming up the stairs as I write. They are behind me about to stab me and instead of running I am documenting this event.

The guy has stabbed me in the gut, it is actually quite painful. I am going to click publish post now, could whoever reads this call the police, and possible an ambulance.